Jacob Totzke

About My Challenge

From February 5th to 27th, I will be participating in the 2026 Push-Up Challenge to raise money for the Canadian Mental Health Association. Last year, I shared that this cause hits close to home. This year, I wanted to share a bit more of my own story.

 

In the summer of 2020, my brain hit a breaking point, and I entered a deep state of psychosis that resulted in me being held in a psychiatric ward for over two weeks. Due to the pandemic, I wasn’t allowed any visitors, and it became one of the darkest and scariest periods of my life — both for myself and for those closest to me. When I eventually returned to everyday life, I was a shell of who I once was. I was depressed, paranoid, and carried a deep belief that this experience defined who I was. I felt completely void of confidence, self-worth, optimism, and any real understanding of what had happened to me.

 

Through the help of medication, psychiatrists, and outpatient care, I slowly began to settle back into myself, though still without a strong sense of purpose. The following summer, I began working again and forming connections that gradually rebuilt my confidence and ushered in small but meaningful glimpses of hope. What weighs heaviest in my heart when I think about my recovery during this time is the love and compassion my friends and family showed me when I had none for myself. Never judging me or treating me differently, they acted as a life jacket through what felt like a storm I wouldn’t survive.

 

Unfortunately, life — and mental health — is not always linear. The years since have been filled with trial and error as I’ve learned (and will continue to learn) how to be the best version of myself. It has taken years of therapy, uncovering trauma, breaking old habits, journaling, positive self-talk, and consistent exercise to get to where I am now. But I can confidently say that I am the happiest and healthiest I have ever been in my adult life. More than that, I have developed a deep love for life and the world around me — one that exceeds anything I once thought was possible for myself.

 

My goal is to fundraise $2,000, but more than anything, I hope sharing this helps even one person feel a little better about their own journey. This experience is something I once carried deep shame around — something I tried to hide or distance myself from. Now, it is something that drives me to keep wanting better for myself and to live with more intention every day. Find the people, music, places, and energies that make you feel good. And if you can offer a little more compassion toward yourself and the world around you, you never know what kind of beauty might find you in this lifetime.

Dedicated to: Little Jacob

Supporting CMHA Ontario - Toronto

Through a presence in more than 330 communities across every province and one territory, CMHA provides advocacy, programs and resources that help to prevent mental health problems and illnesses, support recovery and resilience, and enable all Canadians to flourish and thrive.

Présente dans plus de 330 collectivités réparties dans chaque province et au Yukon, l’ACSM œuvre en défense des droits et offre des programmes et des ressources qui contribuent à prévenir les problèmes de santé mentale et les troubles mentaux ainsi qu’à soutenir le rétablissement et la résilience afin de permettre à tous les Canadiens et à toutes les Canadiennes de s’épanouir pleinement.

My Challenge History

Pushuperer for  2 years

Push-Ups Funds
2026 2,000 $3,700
2025 2,000 $712
Total 4,000 $4,412

My Push-Up Progress

Thanks to my sponsors

Merci à mes sponsors

Raised

$3,700

Goal

$3,000

SHARE YOUR FUNDRAISING PAGE

https://www.thepushupchallenge.ca/fundraisers/jacobtotzke/the-push-up-challenge